I didn?t lose everything before I went into treatment, I just couldn?t honestly get through my day without a drink. I always thought that I had control and that I wasn?t as bad as an alcoholic, I just drank because I wanted to. I thought I could quit so many times on my own but every time I ended up right back at the bottle. The first week in detox was the worst part, I don?t know how bad it would have been if the doctors didn?t help me through that. It took about the first month to feel like I was clear headed, but the second month is when I started learning that the obsession to drink wasn?t my fault but a symptom of my disease of alcoholism. I learned that my body would continue to crave alcohol but as long as I stayed sober the obsession would stay away. I was able to get involved with the 12 step meetings at White Sands and it changed everything for me. For the first time ever I felt like I was around other people that understood me and didn?t judge me for my weaknesses. My counselor helped me make decisions for a positive change and encouraged me to continue on in the program. For the first time in my life I feel like I?m going someplace and not headed down a dead end road.